It has been two weeks since the day I made my final vows, and I still struggle to find words when I am asked how I feel. The celebration, the preparations, all the dear people we met, made that day one of those hinge moments that mark a “before” and an “after”. The love received, the care, the strong hope and the joy have left a great mark on me, which fills me with warmth every time I remember it, and I continue to be surprised by how good God is. I am so happy and grateful!
Reality and day-to-day life continue, but I confess that I feel that I have lost some slack, and it is difficult for me to return to the fast pace, the rush to meet the deadlines of academic or pastoral commitments and respond to everything, to everyone, without leaving what is important for what is urgent.
Nothing has changed, but at the same time it has. Old and new fears visit me, (and as a friend told me recently “those will be with you all your life”), but along with that I have realized that there is something subtly different: I see more clearly that it is He who has brought me here and makes it possible.
A couple of days ago, listening to a sister talking about the vocations that are emerging in various places, some of them very far away, I thought of those young women who are considering becoming Daughters of Jesus, and I felt a great joy and a great desire to get to know them.
What would you tell them?
They should not think too much and listen to themselves inside. Because good decisions are made with the head, but the essential decisions of life are made from the desire and the heart… That is where God puts his seed.
That if at the thought of giving their life on this path their heart burns (or dances), that they begin to take a step.
They should not be afraid because He will guide them, enlighten them, put people and help them. Let them allow themselves to be accompanied and contrasted by someone who knows them and loves them well.
Let them spend more time with Jesus and ask Him how He dreams them, how they can be happier and more fruitful in life.
That they dare to dream, because without risk, without renunciation, no progress can be made, nor can any worthwhile option be decided without leaving others aside.
I would tell you that because someone once told me what I would like to tell you now, the most exciting journey of my life began for me.
Esther Sanz.